Giant Faith

1 Samuel 17:23-37 NLT — As he was talking with them, Goliath, the Philistine champion from Gath, came out from the Philistine ranks. Then David heard him shout his usual taunt to the army of Israel. As soon as the Israelite army saw him, they began to run away in fright. “Have you seen the giant?” the men asked. “He comes out each day to defy Israel. The king has offered a huge reward to anyone who kills him. He will give that man one of his daughters for a wife, and the man’s entire family will be exempted from paying taxes!” David asked the soldiers standing nearby, “What will a man get for killing this Philistine and ending his defiance of Israel? Who is this pagan Philistine anyway, that he is allowed to defy the armies of the living God?” And these men gave David the same reply. They said, “Yes, that is the reward for killing him.”

Instead of running away from what we say or think we cannot handle, we need to call upon His strength, wisdom, and resources.

When we run, we are doing the same as Saul and the entire Israelite army. We whine like them, helping each other justify our wallowing in self pity and confusion. We gossip and waste time, talking about our lack in abilities. We concentrate on and speak of, our weaknesses individually and as a whole, then, feeding on each other’s growing fear, we enlarge our enemy with in our minds.

We trap ourselves in the mountains of no way, no chance, no future, no help, no hope.

Then just like they did to young David, if someone comes along asking why we’re acting like this, we shut them down and try to put them in their place, trying to make them feel as small as we are acting.

But when David’s oldest brother, Eliab, heard David talking to the men, he was angry. “What are you doing around here anyway?” he demanded. “What about those few sheep you’re supposed to be taking care of? I know about your pride and deceit. You just want to see the battle!” “What have I done now?” David replied. “I was only asking a question!” He walked over to some others and asked them the same thing and received the same answer. Then David’s question was reported to King Saul, and the king sent for him. “Don’t worry about this Philistine,” David told Saul. “I’ll go fight him!” “Don’t be ridiculous!” Saul replied. “There’s no way you can fight this Philistine and possibly win! You’re only a boy, and he’s been a man of war since his youth.” But David persisted. “I have been taking care of my father’s sheep and goats,” he said. “When a lion or a bear comes to steal a lamb from the flock, I go after it with a club and rescue the lamb from its mouth. If the animal turns on me, I catch it by the jaw and club it to death. I have done this to both lions and bears, and I’ll do it to this pagan Philistine, too, for he has defied the armies of the living God! The LORD who rescued me from the claws of the lion and the bear will rescue me from this Philistine!”

Saul finally consented. “All right, go ahead,” he said. “And may the LORD be with you!”

Unwittingly, we block the faith we need to remove our giants. We don’t just block either,  No, we do our best Wto knock it down, stomp it into a pancake, pick it up, and whisk it away like a Frisbee. Who are you to tell me, we say, as we puff out our chest and tower over the help God sent to take away the giant we helped create.

Why do we choose to be defeated and keep company with others who choose defeat, while mocking and jealously making a joke out of those who choose not to ever give up. Those who choose faith over forfeit.

1 Samuel 17:40-49 NLT — He picked up five smooth stones from a stream and put them into his shepherd’s bag. Then, armed only with his shepherd’s staff and sling, he started across the valley to fight the Philistine. Goliath walked out toward David with his shield bearer ahead of him, sneering in contempt at this ruddy-faced boy. “Am I a dog,” he roared at David, “that you come at me with a stick?” And he cursed David by the names of his gods. “Come over here, and I’ll give your flesh to the birds and wild animals!” Goliath yelled. David replied to the Philistine, “You come to me with sword, spear, and javelin, but I come to you in the name of the LORD of Heaven’s Armies—the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. Today the LORD will conquer you, and I will kill you and cut off your head. And then I will give the dead bodies of your men to the birds and wild animals, and the whole world will know that there is a God in Israel! And everyone assembled here will know that the LORD rescues his people, but not with sword and spear. This is the LORD’s battle, and he will give you to us!” As Goliath moved closer to attack, David quickly ran out to meet him. Reaching into his shepherd’s bag and taking out a stone, he hurled it with his sling and hit the Philistine in the forehead. The stone sank in, and Goliath stumbled and fell face down on the ground.

Our giant may not be a Philistine giant named Goliath, maybe it’s the lack of patience, for an unruly child, who is always disrespectful and mean, or, it could be giving ourselves  over to self-pity, as the sting of life’s lemons, catch us off guard, seaping into our sores, from watching the lazy get handed what we work so hard for, on a silver platter.

It could be that the giant we face is called self-righteousness or pride. Maybe our lack of self control, when we cannot bring ourselves to submit to the authority of someone who knows so much less than we do, by a long shot.

Sometimes our giant is trying to defend ourselves from the lies of those who falsely testify against us.

No matter what name our giants may go by, when we try to battle them on our own, we come out defeated, tired, confused, and sore. Because of the hell we go through, and the battle scars we obtain, from going out to battle on our own, we often get angry when confronted with the Truth of God’s word and we reject it, run from it, twist it or turn it while at the same time, shoot with the intent to kill the messenger.

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 NLT — Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

We neglect to realize, God knows we are not capable of handling our own giants, much less anyone else’s, still we are called to battle both. We just weren’t called to battle them, with our own strength.

Exodus 14:14 NLT — The LORD himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.”

Until next time, may God-bless you and keep you, as you seek him, with your whole heart.

Dear daughter

Dear daughter,
I just want you to know
it’s with a broken heart
I let you go
I want to stop you
and somehow make you stay
but it’s your life to live
and I can’t stand in your way

All I really want to do
is hold you in my arms
protect you from this hurting world
guard you from all harm
I know that it’s impossible
to spread your wings and fly
when your wings are tied together
under a mother’s watchful eye
so with my heart in pieces
holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
and just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
until you’re home

Dear daughter
seems we always disagree
burning Bridges go for miles and miles
that separate you and me
although we argue
and say things we don’t mean
my love for you is unshakable
even when we disagree

All I really want to do
is hold you in my arms
protect you from this hurting world
guard you from all harm
I know that it’s impossible
to spread your wings and fly
when your wings are tied together
under a mother’s watchful eye
so with my heart and pieces
holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
until you’re home

Dear daughter
I’m sorry I ever let you down
to me you’re really special
I’m happiest with you around
I try so very hard
hoping you feel the same way
I guess if I hold too tight to you
I might smother you someday

All I really want to do
is hold you in my arms
protect you from this hurting world
guard you from all harm
I know that it’s impossible
to spread your wings and fly
when your wings are tied together
under a mother’s watchful eye
so with my heart and pieces
holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
and just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
until you’re home

Daughter I often pray
that there will come a day
you and I will gather all the pieces of the bridges we’ve burned down
Together build an unbreakable bridge to connect our hearts somehow
Until then,
with my heart in pieces holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
but just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
While your so far away
I’ll be counting all the days
until you’re finally home

Discarded

My tree is full of fruit,

people pick to eat.

The fruit I bare,

so they say,

is heart warming and sweet.

Gentleness and kindness,

joyfulness and love,

patience and understanding,

people never get enough.

My fruit is disappearing,

no one seems to care,

they’ll no longer have the fruit,

from the tree they love to share.

I’ve been blown in the breeze,

I’ve been left out in the cold,

I’ve been trampled in the dirt,

now my fruit begins to mold.

Once brokenhearted

Have you ever had a real broken heart? I’m not talking about I’ll miss you, cry for a few days and be over it kind of broken heart. I’m talking about that ache deep in your core, somewhere between your lungs and above your stomach. That block, something is there but you cant get it out. No amount of tears can help you. That desperation kind of heartache. You try to keep busy so you don’t have time to dwell on it but it traps you. You cant move. You either want to die or make it go away. Have you ever had this kind of broken heart?

I used to live with this broken heart everyday. I was continually suffocated by it. Sometimes I would get relief for an hour, maybe a day, but then it would just come back to torture me again and again. It wasn’t about loosing the love of my life, he was still there right beside me, trying to understand how I could be so happy yet so utterly unhappy at the same time. It was not about loosing my children, their smiling faces would shine up at me everyday just wishing mommy had the power to smile more often. You see,  it wasn’t about loosing a loved one to the hereafter, or not having my dreams fulfilled, or being alone. No, the hardest thing  was, it was not because I had anything to be unhappy about.

           I had a wonderful life. I was surrounded by people who loved and supported me. Problems? Sure, I have lived a life of ups and downs, but who hasn’t? We all have burdens to bear. In fact, I couldn’t pinpoint one thing to be heart broken about in my life.

           There it is! An unending, unyielding, broken, shattered heart for absolutely no reason at all. How do you beat that? How do you heal that? How do you make it stop? When hurt by circumstances, it is easy enough to just change the circumstances, then just like that the hurt is gone. What could I do about this broken heart? It was just there taking over my mind and body as it pleased. How could I make it stop? How could I continue to live with the unending pain that would catch me off guard and wanted to destroy me?

 

It seems that, all around us are the devil’s lies. Most of which we haven’t even discovered are lies and so still believe them as truth. So many of us go through our days just trying to breathe, searching for hope, all while feeling tired and alone. So much of the feedback we receive from others is muddied and often hollow, for brokenness, heartache and struggle make up the true pandemic these days.

Everyone is hurting, everyone is struggling just to barely survive. Each of us in our own personal way, gasp for air as the waves carry us away.

 

Where is a hearing and listening heart?

Where is a timeless shoulder?  Where is a cheerful giver?

Where is a non-complainer?

Where is an encouraging speaker? Where is an unbiased leader?

 

Our society as a whole, it seems,  took a path that felt good and sounded right. We never saw the dividing wall through all the laughter and the smiles. Smooth and Sly the serpents invisible walls started to divide. Broken homes, broken friendships, broken families, broken countries, broken lives. Everyone must fend for themselves, no time for another’s problems and strife. What about me, what about me, what about me we all cry! None seem able to put themselves aside.

Have we, become so deceived, blind, full of wishful thinking, rose colored glasses wearing or downright truth ignoring, in today’s society?

 

Have we, in an effort to build ourself up, to love ourselves, to self motivate, really become shut off and cold to each other? Have we hardened our hearts, taking the community out of humanity?

 

Ashamed I fell to the floor and surrender my crown, asking the Lord to take the lead, when in my spirit I heard, if you want to change your heart and find the purpose to your life, all you have to do is change your mind. Fix your eyes upon Almighty God and refuse to believe the world and all its lies. It’s your choice when your confusion finally dies.

 

In this upside-down world amidst sorrow and pain, there is still a beautiful joy to be found. John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.

 

Jesus said in  John 15:11, “These things I have spoken to you so My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full.”

 

I no longer live in that almost constant state of depression. Jesus pursued me and found me thirsty! Hungry for what only He can provide, to this day He never ceases to fill me up. Even with all my sadness, my flaws, He pursued even me. Wow!

 

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!

— Philippians 4:4.

 

Until next time, may God bless you and keep you, as you seek Him with your whole heart.

 

 

 

You are not an accident

To my daughter who was left to tread the muddy waters alone. As your little ones look to you for structure, guidance, discipline and love I see every single piece of the shattered heart you so courageously hide for the sake of the innocent.

 

To my son sitting there on the park bench alone, wondering if you could take your own life, instead of seeing the sad disappointment in the eyes of your family, having lost everything as payment for the years of hard work and sacrifice you so loyally gave. I know, through the hopeless desperation you feel, strength is your outward adornment, to save your loved ones from the fear and worry you know so very well.

 

To my young daughter who runs in the night, unsure of your destination, so long as it is far from his sight and also to my young son who has not a friend in the world, as life deals you the double tragedy of, the sudden loss of your family and your home.

 

To all my son’s and daughter’s who sacrifice every dream, every party, every holiday spent with family, every 1st of your growing child, and so many others sacrifices’ including your very life, to keep your country safe and secure. You may think no one notices what you are truly suffering, the things you go through without so much as a thank you from those your risking your lives to protect. I see, I see the deep grief from loss and I know the struggle to continue serving a world so un-appreciating and blind to what it truly takes so they can sleep in peace at night.

  

To all my children who can’t breathe, even a breath of relief, from the sorrow, heartache, and relentless pain you know and live each day of your life.

 

You are not an accident. You are not alone. You are not unworthy.

 I’ve been waiting for so long to finally have this opportunity to speak to you. Time is short and right now the most important thing to Me, is this message getting to you.

 

Will you hear what I want to say?

 

My Word that was written for you says, Psalm 139:15-16 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them.

You see David, a man after My own heart, wrote that as he was Inspired by My Spirit. He was beginning to understand who he was in Me and how much is My love for him.

 

My child, as David did, can’t you understand?

You are NOT an accident! Take a moment to comprehend what I just said to you. YOU ARE NOT an accident.

You and all your attributes, all your flaws, everything that makes you, you, is on purpose. I did not go on a bathroom break, take a long lunch, accidentally drop the mold, or have an oops moment, when I created you. I was so very focused and determined, as I knit you, making sure all of My thoughts about you were woven together to make you, you, and very, very much on purpose.

 

Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, And before you were born I consecrated you; I have appointed you a prophet to the nations.”

 

You can go forth throughout the Earth and search for an equal to the special you truly are.  From mountaintop to mountaintop, ocean to ocean, city to city, from the heights of the heaven’s, to the depths below, there cannot be found, another like you.

 

The enemy hates you because you’re My favorite. The enemy will go to any extreme, to stop you from realizing how magnificent and unique you truly are. He steals My love from your heart and your worth from your thoughts.

 

1 Peter 5:8 Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

 

 Don’t believe his lies. Don’t let him steal your special and  most of all don’t let him steal our relationship, it means so much to me.

 

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10

 

You suffer so much at the hand of our enemy. Yes your enemy is My enemy. Not one arrow he shot at you has gone unnoticed and will not go unpunished. I have caught and saved every single tear that fell from your eyes not allowing a single drop to hit the ground.

I have grieved your thoughts, your prayers, your time and your praise because of our enemy and his deception.

 

Nothing is hidden from me in all heaven and on Earth.

Hebrews 4:13 And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are open and laid bare to the eyes of Him with whom we have to do.

Your mind May trick you into believing you can hide your worst parts from me as you hide them from the world, your worst thoughts, desires, etc. But nothing can be hidden from me including the very reason such worst parts of you exist. I am aware the enemy wants you to believe you are beyond help, he wants you to believe you are bad, evil to your core, yet he doesn’t know you like I know you. I know the number of hairs on your head.

Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear; you are more valuable than many sparrows. Luke 12:7

 

I know your heart, the depths even you have been blinded from seeing.  

I watch with tears as you battle, thinking you are alone, For your struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12

I am right there wanting so much for you to accept my help.

No wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. 2 Corinthians 11:14

The enemy disguised as light blinds you from the need and desire to seek me and know my voice because he would lose his control over your thoughts. Darling child learn my frequency my voice and guard your heart against any fake counterfeit trying to lead you astray.

 

My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me; John 10:27

 

The enemy says you’re addicted to drink, a drunkard, worthless. I say I love you and long to spend time with you.

The enemy says you’re an addict never going to stay clean, he says you are unworthy to be in the company of the church. I say I love you and you can come into my house.

 

The enemy says you are mean and full of hate, that no love exists in your black heart. I say I love you, allow me to be the wall of protection for I will guard your heart and save you from past hurts happening again.

 

I’ve longed for you to hear My voice, for you to feel My love, my arms wrapped around you, carrying you through the storm, for you to see My good works in your life. Oh how I yearn to be close to you. How long would the enemy be able to feed you lies about My character, My attributes, My mercy and My love, I often thought.

 

Child,

I long for you to truly understand, you are special! Even all your scars , brokenness, attitudes and temperaments. You are loved so much that when I sent My one and only begotten Son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16 I did that for you and even if only you accept Him, no other person in the world, just you, I wouldn’t change a thing. Jesus would have done all that He suffered for just you. You are so very important! You truly matter! It’s time you realize just how unique, amazing and special you are. There never has been, and never will be, ever again, anyone like you! Created within you, is something no one in the entire world has. One reason I GOD love you so much is because you, are the only you, I ever created. You are not replaceable.

 

You, are that one special gift I blessed the rest of the world with that no one else can offer the world. You, and you alone hold the right to decide if the world will receive the gift I placed within you. I took My time first, thinking about you, then, skillfully putting you together.  Psalm 139:13-14 For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother’s womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well.

 

I know you haven’t always loved me, I’ve heard your angry cry’s as you often blame Me, I am aware of your chaotic thoughts as your understanding of your circumstances evades you, I watch your time fill up leaving no time to get to know me causing a canyon between us to form and yet, I want you to know it’s ok. I still love you. I still long for you to come home.

 

Listen to the TRUTH. You are not, I repeat, you are not, an accident, a second thought, an oops moment, a doesn’t add up, a wrong side of the tracks, a born into the wrong family or at the very least, wrong generation, etc. creation.

 

Understand, you are a very on purpose, vitally important, and much loved creation.

 

You see your only real mistake or problem is in the believing the lies of the enemy about yourselves and others.

 

To truly understand who you are, you only need ask your Creator and Savior. The key is knowing My voice so you can discern My answer, and that requires relationship.

 

The enemy would much rather you have religion instead of relationship and he will block every attempt you make toward relationship, in hopes that you will become discouraged, disappointed, disillusioned, most of all distracted. See you, can’t outwit him or win against him, but Jesus did, so then, by My Spirit living within you, you have authority over the enemy. Use your authority and help others to do the same. Come home to your Father Whom loves you.

 

Love,

Your Heavenly Father

 

These words were spoken to my spirit I believe from the Holy Spirit.

Until next time, may God bless you and keep you, while you seek Him with your whole heart.

 

P.S. Thank you truckers in Canada and around the world for standing for our freedom and for being an example of true patriotism. You did it, you’re doing it! May God bless you and your mission. May God bless all who have joined in and stand with you!