God needs no apology

Daily repentance is not because God needs an apology. No, He is not vain or puffed up. He, came down as Jesus, to my level, made himself less, to save me, to show me how much He truly loves me. His love requires no apology to make Him any more right, any more holy, or anymore big. His love covers a multitude of wrongs.
1 Peter 4:8 NKJV — And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.
Daily repentance is required not for Him, but for me.
The enemy is less likely to beat me up, than he is to puff me up. If he were to beat me up, he knows, I’m way more likely to go to my Father in heaven when I’m down.
But now, if he can puff me up, making sure I feel good about who I am and confident that I am on the right track, I’m less likely to ask my Father in heaven for help. Why ask for what I don’t need? Right?
Oh so patiently the enemy waits, lurking in the shadow’s. Watching, waiting for that right moment, that precise moment he believes to be most impactful, detrimental, and sure to shatter both my heart and soul.
The enemy showing no semblance of mercy, goes to work setting the stage…
Everything is going so good. My heart is filling up as people are noticing Jesus living in and working through me. Even those that persecuted and hated on me are confronted with how much Jesus shown in my life. There’s no doubt lives are touched even changed. There might be a few things come up that question the validity of my walk and my heart, but I’m not perfect yet, I reason. I’m still growing and learning, God’s not finished with me yet. I can’t be Jesus, no one can, but I can be His vessel.
2 Corinthians 4:7 KJV — But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us.
Life is moving in the right direction finally, and even though there are ups and downs, I’m not crushed or alone anymore. I’m feeling purpose, like maybe I do matter after all, maybe I have something to contribute in this world.
Stage is set, just one more final touch.
Life gets busy, so busy helping others, being there for others, ministering to others, I have less time to spend in Father God’s presence. I’ll pray throughout the day, read devotionals, talk and fellowship with like minded believers, I’ll think on a verse or two while I’m going from one place to another, yet, time on my knees, crying out to Him, in surrender, with my ego, pride, and heart laying in pieces before Him, has depleted to basically never.
And then, the fall…
Now the enemy makes his move, his kill shot, final blow. He knew this whole time what would irritate me. He knew this whole time what would bring out the ugly still hiding within me. He watched and waited, holding back, until now. Then all at once Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
Daily repentance is not about God wanting an apology. It’s to keep me in a place of true humility and therefore protect me from the enemy setting the stage for my fall. It’s also to keep my perspective about others, even those who prove to be my enemies, in check with the Truth only He knows. My only hope against the deception and dividing tactics of the enemy being able to use me, is knowing and understanding that no matter what I think I know, God and God alone knows the truth. I must trust Him and follow His directions for my own safety and wellbeing.
Therefore, I must repent with truth in my heart. Not from a place of fear and a mindset of not having a choice. No, be truly sorry for falling short, not wanting to disappoint God. Not wanting to hurt God. If my heart is not sorry because I live in a world that sees what I’ve done as normal, no big deal, or just expressing myself, then my heart is not truly repentant and I won’t change those ways in me. Before going before the Lord to repent, first I must go before Him and ask for Him to “right” my heart. I need to ask Him to open my eyes, my mind, and my heart to His ways. Then ask for Him to speak His Truth, the only Truth into my rebellious heart, so I may see. Also ask Him to show me His love, grace and mercy, so I can fall in love with Him and insomuch truly desire to want to please Him.
Sometimes a person isn’t sorry about certain sins because their lives have been lived in a fallen, rebellious, broken world and it’s hard to think of a normal, no big deal, thought or action as a sin. Other times the difficulty in seeing the truth about sin is in the fact our flesh enjoys the very thing being called sin. We really don’t want to let it go. We can’t see life without it. And still another reason can be because we have come to believe it’s who we are and being sorry for it means we are ashamed of who we are and of our true self. All these are strongholds.
2 Corinthians 10:4-5 NKJV — For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.
The truth is, simple, it’s Jesus.
John 14:6 NKJV — Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.
No matter the stronghold that may be blinding me, the Truth, aka reality is, Jesus.
First I need to come into agreement with Jesus, The Truth. Then because I know and agree with Him, I ask Him to change my heart to reflect His. Finally, I make a daily habit of coming before Him, asking Him if there is any offensive ways still in me, while repenting for those offenses I already know I’ve committed.
I do this not for God’s benefit, but for my own.
Until next time, may God bless you and keep you, as you seek Him, with your whole heart.

Warrior Words

I think about the word of God. He said let there be,
and it was. And now thousands of years later, it still is.

Then I think of
the Psalms. Most were written by David, before and after he was king. His words
still have power today, thousands of years later, to change and touch lives.

When David was
just a boy tending the family sheep and he would sing songs to Father God, I
don’t think he had any inkling that those very songs would be a witness to
people thousands of years into the future.

I’m willing to bet most biblical characters never
thought Father God would be using things they have said and done to help reproach,
teach, inspire and encourage us today.

Who am I to think my words will somehow go unnoticed?
Maybe Father God intends to use my gossip session as a lesson of what not to
do, a few hundred years from now.

Matthew 15:18-19 NLT — But the words you
speak come from the heart—that’s what defiles you. For from the heart come evil
thoughts, murder, adultery, all sexual immorality, theft, lying, and slander.

Think of our words as warriors we send out into the
world. They are unstoppable once uttered. Once they are loose there is no way
to change our minds and call them back. These warriors go out with mission and
purpose and they don’t rest or sleep and they never tire. There are two tribes
of warriors we all have available to us in endless numbers. The white warriors
and the gray warriors. Every single word we give voice to and speak out is
activation of either the white warriors or the grey warriors.

Once uttered the white warriors will go out to spread goodness,
kindness, gentleness, peace, patience, joy, forbearance, self-control, faithfulness
and love. The gray warriors will go out spreading gossip, division, hate,
anger, lies, intent on killing, stealing and destroying.

No matter what, one or the other, white or grey, are
attached to every single word we utter or give voice to. The possibility of empty
words containing no warriors at all doesn’t exist. Even empty words we choose
to say that have no emotion or meaning behind them whatsoever, still contain either
white or grey warriors. So no matter what if we choose to speak we release
warriors. We either utter life giving
words or words that will end up being a curse upon somebody else or even
ourselves.

James 1:26 NLT — If you claim to be
religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your
religion is worthless.

Our words are very, very powerful! Although
we are told this over and over in God’s Word, we still speak so carelessly. We
allow words to slip from our lips, choosing to stay blind to what we create for
our own reality, and blessing or hurt we speak over those around us.

Proverbs 29:20 NLT — There is more hope for
a fool than for someone who speaks without thinking.

The enemy deceives us with the lie, “sticks and stones,
may break my bones, but your words can’t ever hurt me.”

Scripture tells us opposite.

The truth is, sticks and stones, have less chance of breaking
my bones, than your words, that are sure to curse me.

I had a few physical fights with girls I went to school
with when I was young. Thinking back, I cannot remember any physical pain or injuries
I may have obtained from those altercations. I can however, remember all the mean things girls in school
would say about me, as if they were just said yesterday.

Words that have emotion behind them, good or bad, gray
or white, have more power to cause what they’re bent out to cause such as, good
or bad, hurt or help, division or unity, destroy or encourage, hate or love.

Proverbs 21:23 NLT — Watch your tongue and
keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble.

When our words come from reaction to something or
someone, we, by reacting, open a door to the enemy. The enemy then takes over
and manages our reality. As long as the enemy can keep us reactive and speaking
emotionally, we cannot elevate spiritually because our words keep us in
bondage.

If however we choose to practice self-control and decidedly
bite our tongue, choosing not to react, we maintain control of our own reality.
We also, as we hold our tongue and remain self controlled, realize we had the
means of spiritual growth, all along. We also start to see the floodgates of
blessings open up, as we choose our words carefully.

Proverbs
18:20-21 KJV — A man’s belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth;
and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled. Death and life are in the
power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.

We have to
understand, we don’t get to choose if our words hurt or help others just
because of how we meant them. No matter if we think someone should discern our
meaning or not, wont stop them from feeling the way our words made them feel. We
cant dismiss our responsibility for the effects our words have by saying we
didn’t mean it like that. This includes the words we utter about ourselves. We
say things like, I always lose, I’m just clumsy, I’m not good at that, etc.
Etc. We barely notice we are living the very things we allow ourselves to speak
out. Whether we like it or not our words every single one that comes from our
mouth has power to do either good or harm.

Proverbs 12:13-14 NLT — The wicked are
trapped by their own words, but the godly escape such trouble. Wise words bring
many benefits, and hard work brings rewards.

James 3:5-10 NLT — In the same way, the
tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a
great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of
wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire,
for it is set on fire by hell itself. People can tame all kinds of animals,
birds, reptiles, and fish, but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and
evil, full of deadly poison. Sometimes it praises our Lord and Father, and
sometimes it curses those who have been made in the image of God. And so
blessing and cursing come pouring out of the same mouth. Surely, my brothers
and sisters, this is not right!

Friends, the words we speak have a power we can’t seem
to truly imagine. None the less whether
we can imagine their power or not, wont
change the power they possess or the consequences, of our carelessness, in
which we speak them.

Until next time, may God bless you and keep you, as you
seek Him with your whole heart.

Dear daughter

Dear daughter,
I just want you to know
it’s with a broken heart
I let you go
I want to stop you
and somehow make you stay
but it’s your life to live
and I can’t stand in your way

All I really want to do
is hold you in my arms
protect you from this hurting world
guard you from all harm
I know that it’s impossible
to spread your wings and fly
when your wings are tied together
under a mother’s watchful eye
so with my heart in pieces
holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
and just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
until you’re home

Dear daughter
seems we always disagree
burning Bridges go for miles and miles
that separate you and me
although we argue
and say things we don’t mean
my love for you is unshakable
even when we disagree

All I really want to do
is hold you in my arms
protect you from this hurting world
guard you from all harm
I know that it’s impossible
to spread your wings and fly
when your wings are tied together
under a mother’s watchful eye
so with my heart and pieces
holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
until you’re home

Dear daughter
I’m sorry I ever let you down
to me you’re really special
I’m happiest with you around
I try so very hard
hoping you feel the same way
I guess if I hold too tight to you
I might smother you someday

All I really want to do
is hold you in my arms
protect you from this hurting world
guard you from all harm
I know that it’s impossible
to spread your wings and fly
when your wings are tied together
under a mother’s watchful eye
so with my heart and pieces
holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
and just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
until you’re home

Daughter I often pray
that there will come a day
you and I will gather all the pieces of the bridges we’ve burned down
Together build an unbreakable bridge to connect our hearts somehow
Until then,
with my heart in pieces holding back tears in my eyes
I’ll wave goodbye as I watch you go
but just in case you don’t know
my heart won’t beat the same
While your so far away
I’ll be counting all the days
until you’re finally home